Thoughts become mindsets that were modeled to us and formed by the age of 7. It is basically socialization, which teaches us to assume there is something wrong with me, to focus on our flaws, to judge the flaws when we find them, to hate ourselves for being the way we are, to punish ourselves until we change. “By the time socialization is complete, most of us hold an unshakable belief that our only hope of being good is to punish ourselves when we are bad. We believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that without punishment bad would win out over good.” This is the focus on sin that so many preachers focus on from the pulpit in hopes of creating an atmosphere for repentance by exposing sin. To tell you what your sin is, “for your own good”, in hopes of producing change in you, won’t motivate you to behave better. The church is suppose to be where you walk in and make a great exchange with Daddy who exposes the strength you already have within yourself, through Him, so you see yourself as He sees you. You give him the self-perfection image and He gives you the confirmation you need to know that with Him all things are possible, then identity takes form in a firm foundation that you build upon. Then amazingly, you don’t see your attributes as lacking, but as flourishing and you can kick the socialization of this world that the church has bought into, to the curb. Suddenly you become ok with yourself because you know Daddy accepts you just as you are and because of that you want to do right by Him. “Socialization does not teach us to love ourselves for our goodness, to appreciate ourselves for who we are, to trust ourselves, to have confidence in our abilities, to look to our heart (which is love=Jesus) for guidance.” Therefore, others cannot be put in the place of Daddy to instruct you on the ways to live through constructive critisism and focus on your flaws, even if they are pastors, teachers or prophets of God because Daddy wouldn’t mix a negative motivation with a positive response. He doesn’t see you through the same critical spirit that you see you. “So anytime a voice is talking to you in your own thoughts and it is not talking with love or compassion, don’t believe it. Even if it talking about someone else, don’t believe it. Even if it is directed at someone else, it is the voice of your self-hate. It is simply hating you through an external object. It can hate you directly by telling you what a lousy, sinful, rotten person you are, and it can hate you indirectly by pointing out what’s wrong “out there”. And anytime someone gives you “Christian advice” on how to look at your sin in hopes of laying it down, tell them, “thanks for the pep talk but Daddy knows where my heart is and you couldn’t possibly be beating me up more than I already am myself, but I’m trusting Daddy to give me a new and positive outlook.” Message derived from author Cheri Huber who wrote, “There is Nothing Wrong with You”.